I first became connected with the Muslim Mental Health Conference as an attendee. My mom, Dr. Farha Abbasi has been a coordinator for the conference since its conception, so this was how I was initially introduced to it. In a way I’ve grown up with the conference as it is now in it’s 7th year. The past year and a half I began to help with the social media and promotion for the event, but it took me some time to realize why I felt so attached to this cause. When I was a freshman in college I was struggling to say the least. It was the first time I was independent and wasn’t really sure about what direction to pursue. I was lost and I panicked. One panic attack, turned into many and my anxiety became unbearable. There were days when getting out of bed felt like an accomplishment and I know my family and friends were very concerned for me, but I continued to shrug off their comments. Being the oldest, I have been a perfectionist since birth and more than anything it killed me to admit something was wrong. I was very hard on myself, especially because I grew up in a family of overachievers. Failure did not seem like a viable option.
College was the first time I was exposed to many things like peer pressure. I couldn’t figure out how to balance my Muslim upbringing and fitting in with my peers, who just like me had tasted independence for the first time. I was trying so hard to fit into the dichotomy of “American girl” and “Good Muslim” and for some reason I saw them as two very opposing concepts, although as I’m growing up I don’t see it that way anymore. I didn’t feel like I completely fit in with the Pakistani-Muslim community or the American community, because I often felt judged by both. I didn’t feel like there was a safe space for me to exist as me, someone who isn’t perfect.
On top of the anxiety of social life and school, I never realized how many microaggressions I internalized that were really beginning to take a toll on me. As a first generation immigrant, Muslim, woman of color growing up in America hasn’t always been easy. I moved here the year before 9/11, so the timing was definitely rough. I realized people had assumptions about me without me even opening my mouth. In fact everyone from Muslims to Non-Muslim Americans seemed to have an opinion on how I should live my life. The narrative that was missing was my own, and at 17 this is difficult. I didn’t know who I was as a person and I envied those who did. Doubt, guilt and fear consumed me.
I didn’t know how to approach my family about how I was feeling, because of the shame I felt. Even with mental health and medical professionals in my family, I couldn’t get past the cultural stigma of admitting that I had an anxiety disorder. I did finally talk to my family and they have been an incredible support, I know many people are not so lucky. Recovery has definitely been a process, but I feel I am in a way better place now. Most of all, I do not feel afraid of my own voice. I vowed to create my own narrative, that didn't need to fit anyone's expectations. The key I realize is balance, honesty, self care and to not be so judgmental of yourself. Seeking professional help saved my life and helped me find a new passion for it. I now understand how minority communities can face unique challenges when it comes to health care or seeking mental health services. If I can assist in creating this safe, non-judgemental place for someone else to feel confident in pursuing professional help, then I know I’ve done my part. - Imaan
Now you can do your part! Please don't forget to register for the conference, the deadline is coming up soon!
Registration for MMHC2015: https://commerce.cashnet.com/msu_3737
#MMHC2015 #Nohealthwithoutmentalhealth
College was the first time I was exposed to many things like peer pressure. I couldn’t figure out how to balance my Muslim upbringing and fitting in with my peers, who just like me had tasted independence for the first time. I was trying so hard to fit into the dichotomy of “American girl” and “Good Muslim” and for some reason I saw them as two very opposing concepts, although as I’m growing up I don’t see it that way anymore. I didn’t feel like I completely fit in with the Pakistani-Muslim community or the American community, because I often felt judged by both. I didn’t feel like there was a safe space for me to exist as me, someone who isn’t perfect.
On top of the anxiety of social life and school, I never realized how many microaggressions I internalized that were really beginning to take a toll on me. As a first generation immigrant, Muslim, woman of color growing up in America hasn’t always been easy. I moved here the year before 9/11, so the timing was definitely rough. I realized people had assumptions about me without me even opening my mouth. In fact everyone from Muslims to Non-Muslim Americans seemed to have an opinion on how I should live my life. The narrative that was missing was my own, and at 17 this is difficult. I didn’t know who I was as a person and I envied those who did. Doubt, guilt and fear consumed me.
I didn’t know how to approach my family about how I was feeling, because of the shame I felt. Even with mental health and medical professionals in my family, I couldn’t get past the cultural stigma of admitting that I had an anxiety disorder. I did finally talk to my family and they have been an incredible support, I know many people are not so lucky. Recovery has definitely been a process, but I feel I am in a way better place now. Most of all, I do not feel afraid of my own voice. I vowed to create my own narrative, that didn't need to fit anyone's expectations. The key I realize is balance, honesty, self care and to not be so judgmental of yourself. Seeking professional help saved my life and helped me find a new passion for it. I now understand how minority communities can face unique challenges when it comes to health care or seeking mental health services. If I can assist in creating this safe, non-judgemental place for someone else to feel confident in pursuing professional help, then I know I’ve done my part. - Imaan
Now you can do your part! Please don't forget to register for the conference, the deadline is coming up soon!
Registration for MMHC2015: https://commerce.cashnet.com/msu_3737
#MMHC2015 #Nohealthwithoutmentalhealth